Hot Line Bling and the Perfect Woman
Surprise! A hip hop song degrades women. This time it's not in the overtly sexual way where you see it "in your face" with women in thongs draped over a man in a club wearing sunglasses or women washing a car with close up shots of soapy water running down her chest. This time it's by your super sensitive BWOI Drake. This time it's barely noticeable and that is what the problem is.
Drake's song is addicting, Drake is lovable, you find yourself humming the tune and just repeating his lines over and over again "Girl you got me down, you got me stressed out/Cause ever since I left the city, you/Started wearing less and goin’ out more" but really the songs lyrics are...terrible. I actually can't believe that someone so influential and so popular sings stuff like this, "Used to always stay at home, be a good girl." I'm sorry, what? If I were to watch a Hollywood movie or even a Bollywood movie where someone says something like this I know that people would be offended. So why does no one care when Drake says it?
Mostly I think it is that people don't realize when something is demeaning to women. The western world and especially in pop culture have become a lot more judgmental towards women, they demonize and dehumanize women in pop culture who sing about their ex boyfriends (Taylor) or who wear skimpy clothes (Miley). Females in the media and in music are never looked at as women who are in charge of their image, sexuality or life choices and are almost always made out to be victims, harlots, and etc. Even Beyonce these days can't get away from being victimized; "Jay Z cheated on Beyonce with Rihanna, Beyonce photoshops herself, Beyonce is in a loveless marriage". So far the only person I can think of who isn't portrayed as such is Adele and that's because "she's a good girl".
I'm not going to just flat out say that Drake is a misogynist like most people because I don't think that he is. I think that this is just culture now. He doesn't realize what he's saying (maybe) and those listening to his music do not think anything he is saying is out of the ordinary. This is very, very unfortunate. If a man in the Middle East said his daughter shouldn't be going out and shouldn't be wearing revealing clothes everyone in America would be like WHAT A BACKWARDS INDIVIDUAL boy am I glad to live in America. As soon as Drake says the same thing it's suddenly a hit song.
In the 50's you had the stereotypical male/female dynamic where the woman was a perfect house wife and the man went out to get the bacon. At that point if you were trying to work as a female you would be looked down upon by society for shirking her womanly responsibilities of keeping home. She would likely be accused of not being a good mother or wife. In the 60's more women were entering the workforce and there were discussions and campaigns for equal pay. In the 70's you saw a huge shift in terms of cultural equality where women were not as judged for being in open, consensual relationships or making their own choices in their personal life or studies. There was thought into what women were doing and more friendship between the sexes. In the 80's women were very focused on gender equality and showcasing the power that they had while retaining their femininity, something that was evident in female fashion of that decade. There were kick ass girls to look at in the 80's. Madonna for example was revolutionizing females in mainstream pop culture and Oprah Winfrey was doing her thing on TV.
In the 90's and early 2000's I think gender equality took a little bit of a back seat. The world was changing so rapidly and opening so much globally that men and women were a little overwhelmed. People seemed to just be trying to make something of themselves in the world. Standard family units were a thing of the past with many marriages ending in divorce in America and battling to be happy was a primary focus.
Now what? (Oh you're still reading, THANKS). Well, now, I feel that people have just lost the topic all together. Women no longer stand together, they're more likely to pull each other down either by commenting on someone's Instagram post or trying to BE the perfect women or berating THEMSELVES for not being the perfect women.
I am very, very against those who pretend to be the perfect woman. What they're doing is even more dangerous than any gender inequality issue of the past. In the past women used to talk about how they were struggling to have it all, struggling to balance work and their home life. There was a discussion and an understanding that it was a struggle and difficult to balance things. Now, some women are saying that they CAN have it all. This is BAD.
The "perfect" women is everywhere. She's having a natural birth and then losing it instantly simply by breastfeeding and "running after their toddler". The perfect woman is a CEO of a company, just had birth and did not take her maternity leave. Yahoo's CEO stated that "since her pregnancy was healthy and uncomplicated" she was only going to take 2 weeks of maternity leave and that she was going to work throughout. This implies that unless you have a complicated pregnancy and need the rest you shouldn't be taking it. You should be working. What about bonding with your child or breast feeding when your baby is hungry every hour? Sure she's a CEO and can probably afford to leave the office when she needs to, but other women can't. There are only so many female CEO's in the first place, I would have really appreciated it if she set a better, more realistic and achievable standard for other women. For women who have C-sections it takes 4 weeks or longer to recover. The fact that I'm even giving reasons as to why a women should be able to take her full maternity leave is wrong. It should be our right. Someone so influential should not be setting such a horrible precedent for the rest of women in the workforce.
So if you aren't berating yourself for not being perfect, or on the flip side telling women that they "can have it all" by being the perfect businesswoman and then coming home to cook for their husband and bring their straight A students to their violin class - you might be the woman who think that by staying home and being a good girl you will get the perfect husband who will treat you like the "Queen" you deserve to be treated as.
You see all these Memes, Tumblr blogs and Instagram posts that really just pollute your mind and perpetuate that "good" women get "kings" and "good" women aren't like the other vile type of women that are "side hoes". I just don't get this type of logic. I also don't get people who put up quotes like this. Stop perpetuating this "Drake" culture and mentality that women who stay in and cover up are good clothes and "wifey" material. You can be wifey material in a bikini or if you go out and have fun with your friends. You can be and do anything you want to be. It's not fair that men go out with women and then damn those same women for going out with them. Don't condone this behaviour.
It's time to have this discussion again about how difficult it is to be a woman. To realize that we bear responsibility to raise our voices when a millionaire rap star tells us to stay at home and be a good girl, that we bear responsibility to bond together and to discuss issues like how a woman should not have to go in to work after she has birth. To not be influenced by social media or the media in general who tells us that our only values are our bodies and that it's expected that one should look perfect all the time and lose weight immediately after having a baby. We should think about what we like on Instagram when you see someone post about how it's a man's job to respect a woman but a woman's job to give him something to respect. No! It's a human being's job to respect another human being and treat them with dignity. Speak up! The next time you hear someone hum a song with a bad lyric ask them, "what do you think about this lyric"? Strike up a dialogue and a conversation. The worst thing is complete apathy and ignorance to a situation.
I want people to at least understand what they're listening to, and then if they choose to be hypnotized by Drake's eyes and melody they're free to do so!
Drake's song is addicting, Drake is lovable, you find yourself humming the tune and just repeating his lines over and over again "Girl you got me down, you got me stressed out/Cause ever since I left the city, you/Started wearing less and goin’ out more" but really the songs lyrics are...terrible. I actually can't believe that someone so influential and so popular sings stuff like this, "Used to always stay at home, be a good girl." I'm sorry, what? If I were to watch a Hollywood movie or even a Bollywood movie where someone says something like this I know that people would be offended. So why does no one care when Drake says it?
Mostly I think it is that people don't realize when something is demeaning to women. The western world and especially in pop culture have become a lot more judgmental towards women, they demonize and dehumanize women in pop culture who sing about their ex boyfriends (Taylor) or who wear skimpy clothes (Miley). Females in the media and in music are never looked at as women who are in charge of their image, sexuality or life choices and are almost always made out to be victims, harlots, and etc. Even Beyonce these days can't get away from being victimized; "Jay Z cheated on Beyonce with Rihanna, Beyonce photoshops herself, Beyonce is in a loveless marriage". So far the only person I can think of who isn't portrayed as such is Adele and that's because "she's a good girl".
I'm not going to just flat out say that Drake is a misogynist like most people because I don't think that he is. I think that this is just culture now. He doesn't realize what he's saying (maybe) and those listening to his music do not think anything he is saying is out of the ordinary. This is very, very unfortunate. If a man in the Middle East said his daughter shouldn't be going out and shouldn't be wearing revealing clothes everyone in America would be like WHAT A BACKWARDS INDIVIDUAL boy am I glad to live in America. As soon as Drake says the same thing it's suddenly a hit song.
In the 50's you had the stereotypical male/female dynamic where the woman was a perfect house wife and the man went out to get the bacon. At that point if you were trying to work as a female you would be looked down upon by society for shirking her womanly responsibilities of keeping home. She would likely be accused of not being a good mother or wife. In the 60's more women were entering the workforce and there were discussions and campaigns for equal pay. In the 70's you saw a huge shift in terms of cultural equality where women were not as judged for being in open, consensual relationships or making their own choices in their personal life or studies. There was thought into what women were doing and more friendship between the sexes. In the 80's women were very focused on gender equality and showcasing the power that they had while retaining their femininity, something that was evident in female fashion of that decade. There were kick ass girls to look at in the 80's. Madonna for example was revolutionizing females in mainstream pop culture and Oprah Winfrey was doing her thing on TV.
In the 90's and early 2000's I think gender equality took a little bit of a back seat. The world was changing so rapidly and opening so much globally that men and women were a little overwhelmed. People seemed to just be trying to make something of themselves in the world. Standard family units were a thing of the past with many marriages ending in divorce in America and battling to be happy was a primary focus.
Now what? (Oh you're still reading, THANKS). Well, now, I feel that people have just lost the topic all together. Women no longer stand together, they're more likely to pull each other down either by commenting on someone's Instagram post or trying to BE the perfect women or berating THEMSELVES for not being the perfect women.
I am very, very against those who pretend to be the perfect woman. What they're doing is even more dangerous than any gender inequality issue of the past. In the past women used to talk about how they were struggling to have it all, struggling to balance work and their home life. There was a discussion and an understanding that it was a struggle and difficult to balance things. Now, some women are saying that they CAN have it all. This is BAD.
The "perfect" women is everywhere. She's having a natural birth and then losing it instantly simply by breastfeeding and "running after their toddler". The perfect woman is a CEO of a company, just had birth and did not take her maternity leave. Yahoo's CEO stated that "since her pregnancy was healthy and uncomplicated" she was only going to take 2 weeks of maternity leave and that she was going to work throughout. This implies that unless you have a complicated pregnancy and need the rest you shouldn't be taking it. You should be working. What about bonding with your child or breast feeding when your baby is hungry every hour? Sure she's a CEO and can probably afford to leave the office when she needs to, but other women can't. There are only so many female CEO's in the first place, I would have really appreciated it if she set a better, more realistic and achievable standard for other women. For women who have C-sections it takes 4 weeks or longer to recover. The fact that I'm even giving reasons as to why a women should be able to take her full maternity leave is wrong. It should be our right. Someone so influential should not be setting such a horrible precedent for the rest of women in the workforce.
So if you aren't berating yourself for not being perfect, or on the flip side telling women that they "can have it all" by being the perfect businesswoman and then coming home to cook for their husband and bring their straight A students to their violin class - you might be the woman who think that by staying home and being a good girl you will get the perfect husband who will treat you like the "Queen" you deserve to be treated as.
You see all these Memes, Tumblr blogs and Instagram posts that really just pollute your mind and perpetuate that "good" women get "kings" and "good" women aren't like the other vile type of women that are "side hoes". I just don't get this type of logic. I also don't get people who put up quotes like this. Stop perpetuating this "Drake" culture and mentality that women who stay in and cover up are good clothes and "wifey" material. You can be wifey material in a bikini or if you go out and have fun with your friends. You can be and do anything you want to be. It's not fair that men go out with women and then damn those same women for going out with them. Don't condone this behaviour.
It's time to have this discussion again about how difficult it is to be a woman. To realize that we bear responsibility to raise our voices when a millionaire rap star tells us to stay at home and be a good girl, that we bear responsibility to bond together and to discuss issues like how a woman should not have to go in to work after she has birth. To not be influenced by social media or the media in general who tells us that our only values are our bodies and that it's expected that one should look perfect all the time and lose weight immediately after having a baby. We should think about what we like on Instagram when you see someone post about how it's a man's job to respect a woman but a woman's job to give him something to respect. No! It's a human being's job to respect another human being and treat them with dignity. Speak up! The next time you hear someone hum a song with a bad lyric ask them, "what do you think about this lyric"? Strike up a dialogue and a conversation. The worst thing is complete apathy and ignorance to a situation.
I want people to at least understand what they're listening to, and then if they choose to be hypnotized by Drake's eyes and melody they're free to do so!
