Showing posts with label boys. Show all posts

Friend Zone



My response: Fellas, girls are sick of hearing you talk about the Friend Zone.  The "friendzone" is a scenario the rejected make up to make themselves seem like victims simply for not having their feelings returned.  Get over it.




Now I've touched on this topic before in my "Nice guys" finish last post but that was quite some time ago (3 years?), and I don't think I fully delved into this topic the way I should have.  Most people who read my blog post at that point didn't really get that "nice" with quotation marks in my vocabulary - did not equal a truly genuine and good guy.

Every guy and every girl should be NICE to other people.  That would be basic manners would it not to be pleasant, kind and friendly!?  So why is it that when a guy feels like he's a "Nice" guy and he's not getting the girls that he wants he suddenly blames everything on being friend zoned and girls not appreciating the value of his niceness?  Why do other guys back this absurd theory up?  

Why is it that GIRLS have to hear "He's Just Not That Into You" where we're taught in books, in movies, in popular culture that we're supposed to stop acting like fools and ACCEPT the fact that the man is just simply not into us...

...While Guys are allowed to BLAME women for not "recognizing" the fact that they were so great and kind and wait for it.. nice?  Guys are allowed to just walk around being like "man I treated her so well, I listened to her while she talked about all of her problems and watched all her favourite movies with her and she just friend zoned me, what a b*tch, chicks are f*cked" while girls are told to accept it.  I'm sorry you're right it's MY fault that someone was friendly, showed common courtesy, had good conversations with me about topics and it's my fault that I didn't want to immediately jump his bones or marry him because of this.  


Why are girls supposed to be so thankful that a guy is being nice to her that we're supposed to date/marry/whatever them?  Do we not deserve, does the GUY not deserve to meet someone who has a genuine connection with them?  Whatever happened to LOVE, Chemistry, Compatibility, Attraction, Passion and other such powerful emotions?  I want men to want more for themselves, I want them to find a girl that loves them for who they truly are (flaws and all) and to wait for someone who they genuinely, truly connect with and most of all I want them to stop blaming women for when their feelings are not reciprocated.  It is not a woman's duty to like you just because you were nice and friendly.

I know so many NICE girls, that have bad qualities about them like every other human being, as well as many NICE guys with bad qualities about them.  Just because NICE GIRL+NICE GUY meet and the person fits all the criteria (well educated, nice, smart, kind, good family, can cook, good job) does NOT mean that they should be together!  

Life is a journey as they say, and I don't know about you but I want someone that I can see myself enjoying my time with for the rest of my life, walking, running, exploring and growing with.. not just settling for someone who checks off the "marriageable" or "dateable" qualities in a man.

Why The Lion King Is So Awesome

There aren’t any annoying humans in it.  Seriously aren’t humans just so annoying sometimes?
The opening sunrise. 
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AMAZING.  AAAAAA SHABANYAAA or whatever they say...  I just get goosebumps.  It really sets the tone for the film and lets everyone know that we ain’t in Kansas no more!  We’re not in lil ol’ America, this isn’t a movie about distressed women who wait for a prince… I mean when in the world does any Disney movie start off in Zulu?! Or any language that’s not English?  Right away, the opening lyrics transports you to a new world… I have goosebumps right now thinking about it.  (I think the Zulu language/African feel of the movie only worked because it was a movie based on animals… Disney would never have let this fly if it was based on an African human family…)
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Scar.  He’s evil, through and through. He wants to be King, he kills to be King.  This is something that has ACTUALLY happened in this world over and over again, and it teaches kids that 1.) not everyone is good 2.) lust for power is a factor in evil 3.) sometimes there is no redeeming quality in a person.  If this movie were to be made now we’d probably see Scar being abused as he’s younger or something to “make sense” of why he’s so evil.  Like why do we really need the psycho babble, POINT IS dude is motha effin evil.  Scar is also quite hilarious – his dry tone and sarcastic attitude crack me up.  I’ve used his lines in real life many a time! (esp: “I’m surroundeddd by idiots")
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Mufasa.  His speech after saving Simba and Nalaa from the Elephant graveyard was amazing.  It sets the tone for the whole movie and when Simba steps in his fathers giant footprint…it literally shows us that Simba will never fill in his father’s footsteps and that that is something that is important to Simba.  Mufasa comes across as a very wise, respected person – someone that anyone should aspire to be.
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Mufasa’s death.  It was so real… and so sad… and it didn’t sugar coat anything.  They really did this scene so well!  “Long Live the King” and then Scar letting go…Mufasa flying back.. cut to Simba screaming… :(  so sad.  Then…to shake off the depressing mood….
TIMON AND PUMBAA!!!  Timon is seriously one of my most favorite characters in any movie!  His sarcasm, his wit, his dry little voice.  ADORABS.  Pumbaa is just a cute little fart.. love him.
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Their philosophy. “Bad things happen and you can’t do anything about it right? Wrong! When the world turns its back on you, you turn your back on the world.”  Hakuna Matata! 
Later on Simba uses this on Naala and tells her “Sometimes bad things happen and you can’t do anything about it, so why worry?” To which she responds – BECAUSE IT’S YOUR RESPONSIBILITY!  And that there in is the whole POINT of this movie.  You have to be responsible and you have to fulfill the responsibilities of your FAMILY.  Simba tells Naala that she is starting to sound like his father to which she replies “good, at least one of us is”.  I was like ooooohhhhh good one Naala! lol.  I feel like most guys nowadays are like Simba – shirking their responsibilites, they have a chip on their shoulder when it comes to their dads (in Simba’s case it’s a kind of resentment that he’s not around “you said you’d always be there for me” he yells to the Mufasa spirit in the sky).  I don’t see a lot of guys my age nowadays strive to be like their fathers or feel a sense of commitment to their family, seems like all they want is to go out, get laid, get drunk, make money, be respected by their friends and peers– they need a Naala and Rafiki to bump some sense into them.  Back in the day I think children felt more of a responsibility to their family.  Anyway I digress…
The Lion King teaches you about friendship (Timon saying to Simba “If it’s important to you, we’re with you till the end), it’s about being more than who you think you are (Remember who you are, you are my son and the one true king…Mufasa also says “You have forgotten who you are and so forgotten me”…Rafiki also tells Simba “He lives in you”.) – Simba just isn’t SIMBA, he’s SIMBA – SON OF MUFASA, it’s a very un-American like concept for a movie, especially a Disney movie.  In America or the new western world we emphasize a lot about finding ourselves, being independent, being unique, and the Lion King really focuses on family, fulfilling your duty and responsibility to your family, stating that you’re not alone – you are who you are because of your family.  It’s a very “Asian” concept.
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The sequence where Rafiki hits Simba on the head and Simba’s like ow what was that for? and Rafiki goes – it doesn’t matter, it’s in the past!  He totally flipped Simba’s newfound philosophy and Simba realized that he was being silly and he couldn’t continue running away… This whole sequence was hilarious: Rafiki: “The question is.. whoooooo are you?” and then Simba’s like “I think you’re confused” and Rafiki goes “I’m not the one who’s confused YOUUU dont even know WHO U ARE” in his accent lol gosh I just love it.
I hope you guys enjoyed my analysis on the best movie ever The Lion King… feel free to comment and tell me what your fav part in this movie is!  Ooh and I left out the hyena’s only because they don’t really teach us anything but they are a super hilarious part of the movie and they do make the movie awesome so – little shout out for Whoopi Goldberg and crew.

An Old Sufi Tale

"One afternoon, Nasruddin and his friend were sitting in a cafe, drinking tea and talking about life and love.  His friend asked: 'How come you never married?'

'Well,' said Nasruddin, 'to tell you the truth, I spend my youth looking for the perfect woman. In Cairo I met a beautiful and intelligent woman, but she was unkind. Then in Baghdad, I met a woman who was a wonderful and generous soul, but we had no common interests. One woman after another would seem just right, but there would always be something missing. Then one day, I met her; beautiful, intelligent, generous and kind. We had very much in common. In fact, she was perfect!'

'So, what happened?' asked Nasruddin's friend, 'Why didn't you marry her?'

Nasruddin sipped his tea reflectively. 'Well,' he replied, 'it's really the sad story of my life.... It seemed that she was looking for the perfect man...' "

***********

I’ve always loved this tale.  I feel like a lot of people nowadays are always looking for the next best thing and they hold out waiting for it, or once they’ve gotten something they are never totally satisfied.

They have an ipad, but they want the ipad 2, they don’t even bother getting the iphone 4 because they’re waiting for the iphone 5.  You get the picture.

I hope this tale above won’t be mine :|  In some ways I am very, very loyal – I had the same mp3 player for over 5 years, I’ve had the same dinky camera since 2006 (even though I work at one of the leading electronics retailers)… So I’m pretty loyal, but yeah it’s def a big problem in today’s society where we’re so used to instant gratification and always getting the newer model.  I guess that’s why there’s so much cheating (adultery) in this world - - - it’s for the same reason that we’re all in so much debt  - Instant gratification/never thinking about the future.

Just Accept The Compliment Goddamit.

I don’t know what it is with girls.  We are SO different from guys!

129167033986932671Guys are used to pumping themselves up.  Their self esteem increases in direct relation to the number they’re bench pressing.  They feel good when they’re making money, when they’re working out, when they’re picking up chicks, and when they’re DOING things.  They have no problem promoting themselves and bragging or boasting about how much they’re benchpressing, how much they’re making, how many numbers they’re getting, how many chicks they’re doing and …you get the point.  It’s all very measurable.  Girls can have an amazing body and STILL be complaining about their fat arms or small boobs. 

When a guy gives another guy a compliment like: “your arms are getting huge”, the guy who is on the receiving end of the compliment accepts it matter of factly.  He does NOT do what girls do and reject the compliment “my arms are nice whatt noo no look at this it’s so jigglyyyy *shake shake shake*”. 

Why is it that girls have such a hard time accepting compliments?  Not only is it stupid to point out your flaws if you really believe they are flaws, it’s detrimental to your self worth and esteem.  TAKE THE COMPLIMENT – ESPECIALLY, and I cannot stress this enough ESPECIALLY if a guy is giving it to you.  Don’t let it get to your head, but just thank him and accept it.  The more you point out your flaws the more he’ll end up believing you!  It will slowly sink into his head and then he might be like ya that’s right, your friend’s ass IS nicer than yours, or ya you’re right your hair really is messed up.  It’s true.  Trust me.

Why Nice Guys Finish Last

EVERY GUY is supposed to be nice because humans should be nice!  Unfortunately most of the people you end up meeting or hearing about tend to be dirt bags and so when you finally do meet that one nice guy, you feel like you need to give him a shot just because he’s (apparently) nice.  That my friends, is the beginning of the end!  DON’T CAVE IN! 
Girls have a tendency to get confused and say “but he’s so nice” and then agonize over why they don’t feel any connection.  It has nothing to do with the fact that this person is nice, it’s just that you don’t connect with them!  You’re not supposed to be with someone just because they’re SUPPOSEDLY nice.
WHY DO NICE GUYS FINISH LAST?!!!!!!!!!!!!!
1.) TOO PASSIVE = I think “nice guys” are just too passive.  They very often don’t hit on a girl as much as a “bad boy” would?  Theory of mine.
2.) NO GAME = constantly texting and being available, “hey we should meet, hey what are you up to, hey how was the exam you told me about once briefly three weeks ago that you were going to write today and I still remembered because I’m a creepy person with no life and I want to impress you with how nice I am?”.  This is what I say in my head to people who do that: BUDDY RELAX!  It’s not that a girl wants a guy to play games and not text her back; a girl wants a guy who has a life!  You should really not be that available, it's a turn off (remember this all you clueless “nice guys” out there!).
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3.) Picture above: straight up!  A “nice” guy is really just a guy who wants to boink you and doesn’t have the balls or CONFIDENCE to say so.  "NICE" GUYS DON’T HAVE CONFIDENCE.  They don’t straight up ASK you to go on a DATE, instead they ask you out for coffee and/or pretend to be your friend first.  They cover up the intentions from the get go, thereby usually confusing the girl who doesn't automatically view you in that light.
4.) Pushovers.  "Nice" guys are known to be pushovers.  If I cancelled on a “nice” guy last minute with a lame excuse they’d be totally ok with it.  A bad boy would be like ok this chick’s a waste of time, screw her and move on.  A “nice” guy would be all understanding and say “it’s ok next time”. There’s nothing WRONG with being nice and with being understanding, but every time you allow yourself to be a second class citizen, girls realize that hey this person is ok with this type of behaviour and treat you like a second class citizen.  People don’t cancel on the Queen of England.  They shouldn’t cancel on you either.  If they do forget to call you back, or cancel on you, or whatever – screw em.

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