Lol
















http://youtu.be/HakwRDxitvo

Dude.  Jenna Marbles is so freaking funny.  I just dig this type of humour.  She keeps it real, she doesn't care to act girly (although she is but she doesn't put up any pretences), act pretty, appeal to men, be fake nice, she's not careful with her words, she's not trying to win any popularity contests, she's not trying to be perceived as anything, she swears, she's not politically correct - she doesn't mince her words.  SHE'S FREE, she's HER, she's NORMAL and is just.. freaking funny!

I remember watching one of her videos a long time ago - when she was not a famous YouTuber yet but her video "How To Trick People Into Thinking You're Good Looking" went VIRAL.  She now has 14 million (yea, 14 MILLION PEOPLE) subscribers.  That's amazing.

Anyway, just had to share.  This type of comedy where someone is just - semi ranting (most of my blogs I realize are just me ranting) but in a hilarious way - is totally my type of comedy.  Jenna, thank you for keeping it real.

(Also - if you watch her "How To Trick People Into Thinking You're Rich" you'll realize she is basically describing every Asian male/female in BC).



The "Chill" girl.

You've heard or know of her.  The "no worries girl" the "chill girl" the "guys love to hang out with her" girl.  The guys think she's different from their gf's girl (HA!), chill and opposite from their (supposedly) "psycho" girlfriends.






















What people don't realize is that often, she's probably just chill because she WAS one of the most psycho girls of all time.  I mean psycho in the best way, obviously. #girlsgirl

She probably learnt a lot from her experience and changed but these supposed "psycho" tendencies still likely exist.

Essentially I think a "chill" girl want's to be cool and awesome and relaxed but sacrifices their actual wants or needs in the process of looking "cool" to the guys.

Part of a Chill Girls' verbal repertoire;
- She (other girl) needs to calm the f*ck down
- It's chill
- it's ok!
- K!
- no worries!
- sounds good!
- yea!
- that's hilarious!
- omg, really lol
- Nice!
- For sure!
- Not much, just busy working
- Aw, no worries!
- I'm not a phone person

And my favourite:
- You're so funny!

Someone who says "I don't care about flowers, there are other things a guy can do to show a girl he cares".  "Valentine's Day is just a commercial holiday" blah blah blah.  Likely a chill girl.  She probably DOES feel those things - but usually guys are too dumb to get that means she wants those things + more.  So she's actually worse (in the sense of less easily accepting) than a normal girl.  A normal girl would be happy with flowers!  A normal girl would Instagram that ish and hashtag it #bestbf.  A "chill" girl  - that means she thinks that's the least you can do - she wants you to do more + she still likes flowers.

The Valentine's Day comment -  you better be upping your game every other day.  Birthdays and holidays?  She probably thinks they are the most important things in the world, but she won't let you know.  These sentences often get people confused and they think you're a "chill" girl, but suddenly a chill girl is left with even less than what she expected.

To be honest - I personally have never been the kind of girl who has said that she hates V day or etc, those are just common examples that I'm using.  I think anyone that knows me knows how much I love flowers, chocolates, teddy bears, special holidays (especially Halloween, NYE and Valentine's Day).  So yea.  Just saying - not everything in this blog (as usual) is a direct representation of my personal self.

Spilling the beans - - - A chill girl is someone who plays the "I give less of a shit" than you do card, always.  She's not actually chill and yes, she does give a shit.

Why doesn't she just tell you what she wants?  Not sure.

"Chill" girl Example:
1. Guy to "Chill" girl: "Heyy stranger it's been a while!" - Chill Girl in her head: "so summer is over, you've been binge drinking every weekend and now that it's Fall you're like oh shit I should text that girl that I met."  What is said in reality: "heyy it has been! :) how are you?".

Why so fake?  Honestly, it's because a "Chill" Girl can't be bothered, and that's the problem! she sees it all,  gets it all but can't freaking be bothered to call someone out on on their shit or to feel or care enough to say something.  Like why should I?  Who are you to me?  Why should I call you out on your shit?

Personally, the more things that happen, the less I care, but I don't care enough in the first place to have said something.  Or maybe it's expect enough to say something.  I just take note of it in my head and that's it.

Personally speaking - it's obviously not good for me to pretend to be ok with things if I'm not.  It's not that I accept things IN MY LIFE that I'm not ok with (in my life if I'm p.o'd at someone's behaviour they will know *cue threatening music*).  It's that these things that are happening are not yet (technically) a part of my life - they are happening with people who I'm still debating about including in my life.  So I still have the choice to accept this as my life or not.  Since I still have a choice, it makes no sense for me to be like "hey that thing you did sucks" when I can easily just walk away from the person who was displaying sucky behaviour.

I'm usually happy and ok on my own.  So then when I try and let other people into my life and they inevitably are idiots I'm not going to get mad or take it offensively.  Maybe I was expecting it or maybe I was relieved when they prove that their company is in fact not worth the peace of my solitude.  Maybe I just expect people to fail, maybe I want more and can't admit it.  Maybe I think if I say something I'll scare them away - like me in my blogs.  I'm obviously a very opinionated, weird and analytical person.

I want to meet a normal person, not someone who I have to "manage" or scold or put in their place or act upset with in order for them to finally get or understand what I want.  I want them to be an adult.

I definitely see people being unsatisfied with their boyfriends, the guys are always "in trouble" or put down or making jokes about how demanding their girlfriends are (while obviously loving it).

The dangerous aspect of a "Chill" girl is if she's being chill to appear as being cooler than she is.  I think that's the aspect a lot of "Chill" girls have where they feel like they can't freak out or they can't expect stuff and they'd rather pretend to be a cool girl than demand what they want or expect.  But yes, girls that are "Chill girls" and are pretending to have beer versus a martini because they think it makes them more relatable or saying no worries when their boyfriend cancels on a date to hang out with friends - that's the dangerous chill girl behaviour that needs to be nipped in the bud.

If you ARE in a relationship and you HAVE expectations, I think it is important to be honest with the other person AND YOURSELF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  So if you WANT flowers and a nice date on Valentine's day and you haven't gotten those random bouquet of flowers you want, I'd mention it in a normal way.  People aren't mind readers after all.  If you AREN'T getting what you want out of a relationship then you need to be honest with yourself, and with your partner. 

I have watched this interview a 1000 times

Mallika Sherawat.  The whole thing - especially 3:50 ONWARDS.  She's first and foremost - a Bollywood actress and not a "popular" one  - thus automatically "not respected" as a woman, not to mention she's one of the first actresses in Bollywood to have kissed on screen.  Her first movie required her to kiss more than 10 times in a Bollywood movie - breaking for sure some sort of record.

People dismiss beautiful women so easily, not to mention ones that initially displayed their sex appeal as one of their plus points.  It makes me inherently sad to have people judge others' intelligence based on their beauty or sex appeal.

Mallika is a rare breed - especially for "Indian" culture.  Independent, presumably sexual - at least comfortable with portraying sensuousness on screen, and has acted in international films opposite Jackie Chan and in other regional films besides Indian cinema.  She came under fire a while ago due to her comments on women in India.

Note that this was at a time that "India's daughter" Jyoti Singh who made International headlines and was treated in Singapore was brutally murdered.  Jyoti was raped and ultimately died due to her injuries.  Jyoti was raped,   by a metal rod, desecrated, and horrifyingly more.

When Mallika came back to India and was questioned by a journalist she for once in an actresses; life actually had facts to back up her statement, did not try to be politically correct, had 100% the truth in terms of what she originally said and why she said what she did. In short - she was smart, intelligent, spoke beautiful hindi and this is one of the truest and most intelligent things I've heard from this industry.

Said with PASSION, strength, etc.  I cried re-watching this as I have many times before (I'm obviously still tearing up.)

Lines: "Aur aurothon ki tarah main bhi chup reh-jaon? (...)  1000 men to 700 women, Khok mein hi marh dehtey hain, aur is desh mein Devi ki pooja ki jathi hain aur female bachey ko khok mein mardetein hain.'


It's actresses like Mallika who 1st of all SPEAK THE PRIMARY LANGUAGE OF HER COUNTRY who can make a change in society in India.  Women, especially those pursuing a career in one of the most sexualized acting industries in the world often don't speak out for fear of a backlash.  I'm still in tears copying what she said in my head.  Moving.

Booty by J.Lo featuring IGGY Azalea


 Reasons why I love Booty by J.LO's Booty song












J.Lo'a ass is amazing.  Jennifer Lopez since the day she's been introduced to the world has always been one of the finest things to walk this Earth.  Her Versace dress moment is STILL the most iconic fashion moment I've ever witnessed.



















Jennifer Lopez is and forever will be hot and a superstar.  She changed the game.  She was a 5 ft something Latina goddess in an era where super tall skinny blondes were popular, she could dance, she could sing, she was a business woman, and she's now worth over 300 million dollars.  In short, she is the bomb.com.












Check out that muscle.  DAYUM!!!!!!!


I cannot believe how old she is.  I think it's soooo phenomenal.  To the people who are like "she's so old, why is she still shaking her as*, can't she do something more with her life, why should I commend her for being naked and shaking her a**" - PLEASE, PLEASE BE worth 300+million, be 45 yrs old and look like Jennifer Lopez before opening your paycheck to paycheck mouth!!  Shut. up.

A male hip hop artist NEVER needs to "evolve" or do something more with their lives.  They can continue to sing the same old songs while plugging whatever their latest champagne/vodka line is with females dancing around them and no one bats an eyelash.  Why all the hate when a female is doing what she came in the business doing?  

Jennifer Lopez was never a Nobel prize winner for goodness sakes.  She is a hip hop/pop artist that has a world famous butt.  So why is it wrong for her to continue to do what she came to the business doing???  Why should she stop shaking it?  Why do people suddenly expect a 40+ year old woman to change???? Why isn't she commended for being relevant, being current, for having an amazing song, for looking good, for working hard for her figure? 

It's not like was playing up to male fantasies throughout the video - I mean obviously she was shaking it and looked hot but she was doing it in a "I'm amazing powerful and phenomenal" way as opposed to playing up to male fantasies like Nicki did in her video.  J.Lo looked bad-ass!  She looked in charge of her figure her sexuality, she looked strong, female and empowered.  

People think that being a feminist or being empowered means you're supposed to cover up and look "respectable" - no that's just women being oppressed and subjected to the ideals of men again.  You don't need to change or cover up or look more serious in order for people to take you seriously.  A truly empowered woman does what she wants, when she wants and has the belief that she'll be respected because she's earned it.


That isn't objectification folks, that's an empowered woman.  Contrast that picture above with: 

Do you see the difference?



Now You Know





















This video is so true to life it's scary!  The ultimate response, "K" hahahaha.  Dead. 

This was amazing.

3am




















So I basically disagree. ^^ I think that time when your day is over and you're all alone, you can doubt yourself or your decisions, think about the worst things, etc etc hence why there are images like the one above.  The funny thing is that while I may question myself or question life or whatever around this time - I also feel really amazing and positive despite whatever I may be thinking.  I just have this weird little thing inside me - like an inner child or inner being that like has my back and is confident.  So basically, I don't agree with the above picture because - I tell myself bad things and great things at 3am in the morning lol. 

A lot of my blogs are posted around this time.  I do think a lot and over analyze things and write about random, weird things.  The things that I write about are NOT ALWAYS ABOUT ME - sometimes I'm writing "as a young woman" and not "as Sharin" if that makes sense.

I may question life or question myself or just generally seem a little too introspective or *whispers* melodramatic.  So while I may write a lot of nonsense some times on this blog, and/or seem kind of emo sometimes, there are somethings that I really want to convey:

1. I am happy
2. My goal in life has always and will always be to be happy
3. I believe I can always be happier, hence the pursuit
4. I want to travel more, learn more and experience more. MOAAARRR
5. I like to share and document my life/thoughts/feelings and be true to who I am, people may not always understand that or understand what I'm saying, and that's ok.
6. I am the hardest on myself so while I may complain about myself or feel I'm lacking something sometimes, I'm also my own biggest fan and think I'm basically fantastically awesome.  You know when you air write something?  I usually air write (or if I'm writing something in a blank notebook) I write - I am the best person in the whole wide world.  I've been doing that since computers only had 500mb of storage (true story).  Obnoxious, I know, but I am to myself (other than obviously my mom my brother my family etc), and I think everyone should be friends with themselves and have a dialog with themselves and look in the mirror and just be like waddup lol.   “Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.”




















How do you eat?!

So, I always take really small bites of my food.  I eat A LOT (as you can obviously tell) but for example if it's a french fry, a chip, a candy - I'll bite into it rather than popping the whole thing in my mouth (that's not what she/he said you sicko).  It might take me 3 bites to eat a potato chip and definitely two for a french fry!

So anyway, my boss was like heyy I have gummies at my desk if anyone wants some "they're fresh and jiggly".  I'm like SOLD!  Fresh and jiggly gummies?! I am so in! lol.. So I trot on over I'm like heck yeah hand me some gummies.  I took a few gummy bears (are they not the best things in the world??!) and a fuzzy peach.

Half an hour later he comes by to ask if I want any more and sees a half bitten Fuzzy Peach on my desk.  He was like "Who IN THE WORLD bites into a Fuzzy Peach and eats half of it??" and then everyone analyzed my half bitten fuzzy peach.  I was so embarrassed but laughing my head off... I dunno!  Am I weird?!  Does anyone else take small bites out of bite sized food?

I definitely have eating problems in general though - I think one of my first posts was about my eating habits  and omg I cringe now reading the stats in that... fml.. ANYWAY ...my question was, how do you eat lol?

I know most people my age are health crazed during the week.. during school/work and then the weekend or holidays or summer (or life, weddings etc) hit and all that goes out the window.  Is that true for you too or are you really disciplined?  Do you eat gummy bears by biting the head off first?

Do you eat potato chips in one bite?

Serious questions yo.  I want to know.  

Questions, life crises etc

Sometimes, I think - what if I have everything all wrong in terms of my life (!!!!) -  what if I'm just f*cking up and actually just making the worst decisions for my life and future??!

I feel like I'm in such a pivotal time period with these huge ? marks floating around.

Do I travel?  Do I go back to school?  Do I climb up the corporate ladder?

Did I lose/skip/ruin/miss/generally f up true love or f up my love story?

Do I get to know insert eligible bachelor here? 

The one thing that I don't believe in is "whatever is meant to be will be", "if it's going to happen it'll happen".  I do not believe in this blasé attitude of letting life happen to you.  I believe in the power of action and making decisions - which is why I'm so stressed about the above... At the same time, THIS attitude above (que sera sera attitude) is the reason why there are so many problems - because PEOPLE don't know what they want, think everything will just HAPPEN and don't go after something.

Ugh.  Anyway, it's 3am and I'm blogging.  Yay life :)  Goodnight!!!  

Highway
















I watched this movie today with my dad and we were just mesmerized.  A little background info on my father - he fell asleep before Mufasa died in The Lion King (which is basically the beginning of The Lion King) and usually falls asleep within 40 min of a Hindi movie.  So yes, it's a little rare for him and I to actually watch a movie until midnight with him wide awake and engrossed in the tale!

It's rare these days for a movie to truly bring me into it's world, where I feel like I'm actually watching a story unfold,  not just smirking/scoffing/blindly being entertained by song, dance, flashy costumes and toned limbs.  I'm a Bollywood fan through and through and I'm often inspired by the glitz and glamour but sometimes you just need to sink your teeth into something more than that.

This movie was amazing.  I'm not saying it's perfect, but... it's very, very close, as close as you're going to get when telling this story unless you're going to do a 3+hour film.  Alia Bhatt's performance was incredible - one of the best performances I've seen, I can't imagine anyone else being in this role.  Randeep Hooda was unrecognizable he was so the character.

I'm just in love with this movie.  Everything, the shots, the acting, the silence in this movie is so beautiful.  AHH. Love love lovee.  I was so intrigued by this film when the trailer first came out and knowing it was an Imtiaz Ali film with AR Rahman doing the music I was like for sure I'm going to watch this right away, kicking myself now that this never happened.

I think, the first thing that got me hooked in this movie (SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) is the vividness with which Imtiaz Ali (the director) depicts Veera's (Alia's character) abduction.

I was so tense, I was cringing, my heart was racing, I really felt it.  Watching them shove the cloth down her throat, seeing her screams, her cry, her vacant expression as she resigns to her fate.. it was painful.  Obviously as a woman, I just feel this more than a male would.  You can't help but view it as real.  When one of the abductors tries to take advantage of her, the whole sequence just made me so tense.

Her innocence, her joie de vivre, her confidence, her pain, it was beautiful.  It's something I think I'm missing, I don't think I can ever look like that, I don't think a lot of people can look like that anymore.  She has something special - her innocent look is really unique.  I think the background that was written for the two characters and the way they shared it was perfect, it made the story what it was.

Anytime I feel like I can analyze something in my head, anytime cinema makes me think/feel, absorbs me into it's world... I'm the happiest person alive.  Art makes you feel something, and this movie made me feel.  Definitely going to sleep satisfied today.



Oh also - just love the fact that there's a mainstream movie that became a hit that literally just tells a story.  There's no objectification, there's no glamour, there's no item song.  It's a story about a girl and a guy, they look dirty for most of the film, they wear the same clothes, it's just pure.  I love that.

I actually just watched 2 States yesterday (my dad didn't watch the whole thing "slow moving" he said and left) and today when I put Highway in my dad was like Alia Bhatt again?? At the end of this movie he said "Now I like Alia Bhatt more, she did a good job, no joke", which essentially is like the highest compliment ever lol.

Because


 And that's how I'll always know. 

Beyonce VMA take 2 and the word Feminism

I need to explain, I heard so much about how Beyonce slayed everyone and I was really expecting this epic, life changing performance and then felt completely let down when I watched it.  I liked her SuperBowl performance way better.

That being said, a lot of what I said yesterday needs to be put in perspective.  Beyonce is HUGE, she's a huge role model for women, she is a huge artist, complete superstar and a woman that has always been so fiercely real, so empowered, so womanly and always evolving as an artist.  That means that sometimes, I have too high of an expectation from her (as women always do of each other I can't decide if that's a good thing or bad), she's the only female artist I have an expectation of.  No one else.

SO, while I was feeling really annoyed by her dancers and a lot of the elements I said yesterday, that's not to say that I didn't like stuff.  I realized that to people who don't know how I feel about Beyonce it could come across as too nit picky and too hateful.  I give her all of the props for what she's done to empower women and what she is as a performer and as an artist.

I think a reason that people feel so strongly about her performances is because here you have a woman who is completely in tune with her sexuality, and this sexuality is being displayed in such an in your face manner that you can either take it as 1) she's sexualizing herself and that's negative because she out of all artists doesn't need to do this or 2.) she's not letting people put her in a box, you don't have to be ashamed of your sexual side, she's free, she's empowered.

About her performance at the VMA's - I felt enough to want to write something about it, speak something of her performance and that is what an artist does - they make you feel something.  She is a complete artist and what she does is commendable and she deserves respect.  I think for me lines just get blurred as to - what is she doing for the shock value/money and what is she doing for herself.  Like how much of what she is doing because it's what sells.

Moving past that, I think what is absolutely amazing is that she brought the F word back.  The dreaded F word that females these days seem to want to avoid being called "Feminism".  Words are powerful and just having that in the background makes you think about it.

When you have women like Nicki Minaj do the complete opposite of what Beyonce does on the regs, and on the same stage it's harder to really "get" what B is doing and what B is trying to say because it sort of looks the same.... but it's very, very different.


Kim Kardashian and her brother Robert

Kim Kardashian.  The name alone evokes very strong feelings from people.



A lot of people hate on Kimberly Noel Kardashian West, or 'Kim' as she's more popularly known as.

She's deemed "a whore" and more than that (unworthy tag); worse, she's deemed a "talentless" individual.

Her main offence?  She has a sex tape that was made with her then boyfriend Ray J.  Ray J of course doesn't seem to share this "whore" title even though he is an equal partner in the sex tape scandal (#misogyny)!  Ray J emerges virtually unscathed, actually he emerges even more infamous and popular than he ever would have been because he "hit it first".  While Ray J can brag about his conquests to the point where he even raps about it, Kim has to apologize and live with this stigma for the rest of her life.  Why, you ask?  Because she is a woman.  Woman are often painted as either whores, angels or victims of the whims of men, they are very rarely portrayed as masters of their own fate and strong decision makers, but anyway, back to Kim.

Never mind that she had sex with her boyfriend, never mind that there are countless of adults in America (primarily) that actually have sex on camera for a living but are never famous yet "Kim is famous only because she had a sex tape".  Never mind that she worked for her father when she was young and was taught to have a hard work ethic and about working for what you want in life (her father constantly made her sign agreements and contracts so that she understood the values of what she was receiving such as a car to drive).  Never mind that she's worth approximately $65 million dollars, never mind that she has clothing lines, perfume lines, was one of the first celebrities to monetize their social network feeds (she apparently gets paid about $10,000 per sponsored tweet), never mind that she's marketed herself successfully for 7 years, but I digress.

I by no means think that she is a perfect human being; my point is that she is a human being - one that has good qualities and flaws.  Yes, she capitalized on her sex tape, her sex appeal and posed naked for Playboy and W Magazine, yes this did not help prudes who would rather deem a non Caucasian with a big ass as instantly "slutty" .  Ray J also rapped about it and capitalized on this in his own way.  Ray J is not a mogul superstar or cultural icon.  I find it so sad that people would rather believe someone who is literally known around the globe is 'talentless' and 'stupid'.  You don't become famous world wide for whatever reason for this many years if you're talentless or stupid.  It's just too simple and so much easier not to mention convenient for (yes I'm going to say this) unintelligent people to believe that a beautiful and famous woman is stupid.  If she was stupid, you would not know who she was, and if you were smart, maybe you would realize that!  Her sex tape came out in 2007, it is now 2014 for those of you who do not have a calendar; a stupid person who had (bad) sex on camera with an E list celeb would not STILL be in the news, still be relevant and still have a CAREER that is minting her more money this year than ever before.

Some background - Kim worked for her father in his law firm, she also started to earn some pocket money by buying and selling clothes on Ebay, she then moved on to becoming a stylist for her friend Paris Hilton and Brandy (Ray J's sister).  Mind you, she was born into an affluent family, there was no reason at all for Kim to start working at a young age - I know people who live in my area that hadn't worked a day in their lives at the age of 25 because their parents paid for everything and were muchhhh less well off than Kim's parents were, yet these are the same types of people that would call Kim "a slut comma bro".

Let's contrast this with her brother Robert.  Robert has a degree and went to the University of Southern California.  Rob does not have a sex tape and is known because of his famous sister Kim.  Rob had a sock line that didn't do very well, has never had a steady job, is severely overweight and rumoured to be addicted to drugs, and more recently has received some tough love from big sister Kim who is actually getting flak for not "supporting her brother" and apparently being "self obsessed".  I'm sorry, why is it that men are supposed to be coddled, nurtured and given special treatment?

If Robert took a page, just one page out of Kim's book he would have 1.) not consumed copious amounts of alcohol leading to other drugs - Kim does not drink alcohol, on multiple episodes, by multiple accounts Kim is described by her sisters and loved ones as a "boring" person as she doesn't like to party, doesn't drink a lot, and doesn't party hard.  I've seen this on episodes of the show and it has remained consistent through the years, you have never seen a picture of Kim Kardashian wasted, trashed, flashing her inner wear or frivolously spending her life partying.  She has been as always all about WORK.  She has always been very aware of her looks, body, appearance as she should be being as this is what she is paid for, but she's always been professional about it and taken it very seriously as this is her job.  That is respectable behaviour in my eyes.

This speaks as a testament to the hard working individual she is.  If Robert had taken a page out of Kim's book he would 2.) Move forward in his life.  Kim has had MULTIPLE failed marriages, has been a public ridicule from people who deemed her to be a "lesser" human being (because being snobby is sexy cough Beyonce cough), has faced multiple ups and downs with her weight most recently due to her forming a life inside of her (no big deal douchebag males and women haters of the world) because she was pregnant, and has always had to deal with this absurd amount of hatred.  I mean if I were to excuse any celebrity for being hated on and then becoming a drug addict - it would be Kim Kardashian!  She has one of the most valid reasons for becoming a failure, yet she continues to strive on, make herself relevant, commits herself to her professional agreements, is responsible and clearly must be smart - at the very least smart enough to hire the right people and listen to them (although I very highly doubt that is all she is smart at doing) and continues to (after multiple hot people arriving on the scene as they do every year) be relevant, current, smart, successful, hard working, image conscious and still nice enough to be respectful and nice to her fans (I've never heard a story of her being a b*tch to a fan).

Power to Kim Kardashian, power to anyone who is smart enough to capitalize on their strengths, who has an entrepreneurial spirit, who worked for their coin, who is real enough and secure enough to call people out on their failures (swear to God if my younger brother became an addict and had the same failures as a man and wasn't listening or trying to change themselves I would and I pray HOPE to be strong enough to deliver the necessary tough love that Kim has stated in interviews).  I am SICK of people coddling Males, massaging their egos and walking on eggshells with them.  I'm sick of people being like "boys will be boys" and "he'll learn on his own you can't tell him what to do" and "he'll make his own mistakes" and "let him figure it out", "you can't say that he'll be crushed, he'll lose all his confidence, he'll rebel, he'll push away, he'll act out" because you know what, No One says that about females.  Females are always so controlled so regulated so expected to be accommodating and strong and understanding, so expected to look out for the members of their family, so with it so together so understanding about what you say to them and this is why they're so strong.

Basically if you couldn't understand my points were that 1.) everyone is so misogynistic 2.) people are smarter than you give them credit for 3.) males need to toughen up.

Ok bye. :D 

What If

There are really soul mates?

What if you really only fall truly in love once?

What if you will never forget someone?

Hard to explain what I mean but I've seen it first hand, life forces you to keep going, to keep on keeping on.  It's annoying, but I guess I just mean..   Anyway.. here's this awesome scene from this awesome movie:
http://dooleyonline.typepad.com/bollywood/2014/01/love-dialogues-are-you-married-meera-love-aaj-kal-1.html

I know that I will always be ok in life because I know how life is like, but what if... what if... it's true? What if people are just dumb and you don't ever end up with your real "soulmate".


I wrote this Jul 31 2014. Things have changed since then...

I wrote this Jul 31 2014 and never posted it.  I should have posted it, this is why I write... to document my life, express my feelings properly and without censoring.  I feel bad that I didn't post this so.. here we go.  It's so interesting to me to realize that small changes have occurred.  I suppose I'll write another blog post soon.

I've always been a self proclaimed "extremist" (see HERE) but even I have grown tired of the roller coaster of emotions that I go through.

I'm tired.  I always have my eyes on the people close to me.  I'm always like "are they ok, are their feelings hurt, are they tired, are they stressed, did I go too far in pushing them to do something productive, am I hurting their ego, should I be more caring versus tough love, should I be more disconnected and let them figure their own thing out, did I act too upset (even if I feel upset) and do they now know that I'm upset but I don't want them to feel like they upset me because then they'll feel bad and I don't want them to feel bad because I know they mean well or they didn't mean to hurt me"... I'm just always so concerned with having everyone around me be ok and be good, and of course that's just trying it's not always successful but I am very mindful of other people's feelings (of those close to me).

I may not need anything from anyone but it's just that sometimes I get really tired.  Like today, I'm tired.  I'm stressed, I've tried to do what I do every day and be happy and chill and be positive and not dwell... like I'm REALLY good now at just being like "No Sharin, you have to be happy" and switch off and find happiness somewhere.  I CHOOSE to be happy but sometimes you want to be able to just lie on someone's chest and have them stroke your hair while actually UNDERSTANDING you.

I've grown used to being alone.  I occupy my time with work, books, TV, magazines, and hanging out with friends as much as I can.  And then laughably I actually get random calls from people sometimes who tell me stuff like "you're actually a nice girl, I know people talk shit about you but you're actually nice".. like what??..1. people still talk about me, and 2. they have ill things to say? how confusing!  If only they knew I spent the last weekend re-reading Harry Potter 6 and 7 ;).

Whether it's in a funny YouTube video or reading a tabloid magazine to distract me, I've learnt to depend on myself and only myself to be my friend.   I watch movies by myself, I have eaten in restaurants alone, I can go somewhere alone after work and sit for a bit, at this point I can't even visualize myself travelling the world with anyone.  I would have to go alone.  There's always going to be someone who says "oh everybody does that it's not a big deal".  It's not.  It's not a big deal.  I'm just saying a lot of people have that person that they can discuss their shitty or good day with or talk about a coworker or talk about the person in front of them in line or talk about their dreams or talk about their failures or talk about whatever.  Even now even though I'm a little down I know I have NO right to be down, I personally know someone who is dealing with so much and in the most painful way and she's so strong about it outwardly that I feel no right to even write this blog post.  I never feel like I have the right to b*tch about something.  I'm always apologizing to myself, to others about how I feel or what I'm thinking.. or thinking that I don't have the right to feel a certain way.  Again, it's tiring, I'm tired.

I do have to say that my mother is my greatest source of comfort and pure love.  Although she is usually the person that I argue with the most and I often get the emotional backlash of her frustrations (that are always totally warranted), she is the person who has my back for 99.9% of situations lol (the other 0.1 percent being my desire to be a vagabond drunk hippie flower artist living in Mumbai).

I just feel like I can't leave until I know everyone is going to be ok.  I need to know that everyone I care about will be ok.



People are Messed Up!

How messed up are people these days?

I recently heard of Sabina Altynbekova (I'll wait while you go Google her since I know that's what you're doing right now)... a 17 year old Volleyball player who has recently been proclaimed "too hot" for Volleyball.

She's from Kazakhstan, went to Taiwan to play Volleyball with her team and instead of being appreciated for her skills; she's now an Anime character, has multiple Facebook pages and profiles devoted to her, has been offered modelling contracts and is international news.  She's SEVENTEEN FREAKING YEARS OLD.  Seriously, you go to watch a Volleyball game and instead become infatuated by a high school child????????  You're a sicko!

This is just so bizarre.  Not that this would EVER happen to me but I'm sure if this ever happened to me I would be 1.) Flattered beyond f*ck and then 2.) Extremely mortified by the level of attention and wished I could crawl into a hole because my parents would be like.. wtf is wrong with the world.

It's kind of like when you go out dressed casually with your Dad and a bunch of creeps stare at you!  It's awkward as hell, your Dad gets mad, you FEEL LIKE IT'S YOUR FAULT even though it's not.

You know, this girl is beautiful(!!!)... she's so beautiful that she deserves a modelling contract, international fame, anime characters based off of her and millions of fans.  Do you know what else she deserves?  She deserves to be able to pursue an education/a degree, athletics, a normal life, other ambitions that she may have without feeling pressured to accept this "once in a lifetime opportunity of becoming a model".  You can be beautiful and still have a life without feeling the pressure to succumb to what society dictates you should be simply because you are aesthetically pleasing.
***EDIT***
Ok - I have to add - I saw a "Sourcefed" video on YouTube which is how I came to know of this, clicked on another YouTube video to see what the deal was and then laughed my butt off at the amount of deluded people in the world!

Seriously, people are so confused.  Most people are commenting about how she's an Asian supermodel in the making and are curious as to why people are commenting saying "mash'Allah" in the comments!!!!!  Seriously do you not realize that 1.) Kazakhstan IS IN ASIA 2.)  She is likely Muslim as Kazakhstan is a predominately Muslim country.  ???  Again, people are messed UP!



Rape.. Oh no I mean Drugs, Drake n Chris Brown, the World Cup.. Interesting topics ;)



I'm writing this post 46 seconds into watching this YouTube video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1dzgqXjhTA8

I'm crying (big surprise I'm the most emotional crier I know).  I have been in more situations than I would like to mention, in horrid and truly terrifying moments where I thought - this is it, I'm going to be raped, this is the end, this person is going to kill me.

I am not exaggerating.  These are the thoughts that run through a woman's head when she is out, when she is alone, when someone looks at her the wrong way, when someone leers at her, when she's had a few drinks, when she realizes that any man who wants to can overpower her, when she's in a cab and the cab driver makes a turn she wasn't expecting, when her phone battery is dead and she's out, when she gets lost, when she goes on a date with someone who she wasn't too sure with, when she's in a public bathroom that doesn't have anyone else in it and she hears the door open, when she's on the Skytrain and someone won't leave her alone, when she gets off at a bus stop and someone who was staring at her gets off the same stop, when she hears someone running behind her and she's on a street walking and the sun has set and no one is around, when she's in a parking lot walking to her car and the only other person is a male and he's walking close to you, when you're at a party and someone keeps pressuring you to walk with them or go somewhere with them, when someone you know is supposed to "drop you off" but are ambling around and giving you really creepy vibes, when you're at a college party and someone is dropping you off at your dorm, when you're on a camping trip and someone is walking you to your tent under a guise of being nice and helpful but you don't really trust them, when you have to ask someone else to come along with you, when you are travelling in a foreign country and you're trying to book a room somewhere, when you're on a Vegas trip with your friends and you have to call security because someone you met casually just won't stop banging down your door and terrifying your friends after you told them no.  Whew.


There are a myriad of situations in which a woman will have that one blinking second (or more) of pure fear, of pure terror, of the thought of being raped.

It is, I believe, every Woman's worse fear.  The act of rape, is a terrifying and very real fear for women.  It's not something like being kidnapped where you think, this only happens to other people.  It's one of those fears that is VERY REAL, it's very present in a woman's life.  There have been multiple "What would you do" type of situations in which a drunken girl in America has been at a bar and a man she clearly doesn't know tries to pick her up.  Watch: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6QcLs98NeJY


 I remember watching that video with my Father no less and tearing up so badly at 2:30.  It is shocking to me to see people do nothing.  That man is a hero in my eyes, he is someone I will never forget.  "She don't walk this freaking place with you because she don't know you".   Word!  Thank you humanity!!!!!!  If you did not cry at 3:04 I don't even want to know you, straight up.

It is heartening to me when people, complete strangers, have come to my aid.  I have walked up to complete strangers and said "hey, this man has been taking pictures of me while I'm standing here, I don't know him, please help me".  Can you imagine?  Literally I have had males that I don't even know block me from being snapped.  My new tactic is to flip my phone to "selfie" mode, turn it around to face the offender and have them see themselves being perverts.  It's actually quite effective (but scary if they get angry).

I have walked up to Skytrain officials without saying one word just looking at them with my eyes and having them personally escort me on the train, have the man refused entry while I boarded and been assured of my safety (this literally happened just last week - he was refused entry and they blocked him from entering my train, I tweeted my thanks here: https://twitter.com/MissSaxena_/status/486782406046023681).  I have been followed on the streets, chased in a car (with my mom driving), been in an almost empty stadium after a job interview and have a man follow me into the bathroom and peel my name tag off my shirt, as I said, more situations than I would care to speak of.

All I want to say is - Women look out for other women but I just don't see men doing the same.  I don't see men feeling that same responsibility, that same empathy and the empathy level drops very significantly if the woman in question has had alcohol.  Alcohol does not make a woman a target, alcohol is not a "no rules apply" situation.  The most drunken woman in the world can lie naked in front of a male member of my family and they would never be touched, they would be treated like a Queen; alcohol is not consent.

Whenever I am out, if I see someone that I think needs help, or may need my help I will NEVER leave them, they will not go out of my sight.  I will personally go out of my way to ensure that they are safe.  It may sound weird to you but I could never leave a situation where I think this girl or old man or whomever is alone, is in a dangerous situation and just leave.  Whatever the situation is, I will stay, I will say something, I will do it...why, because I can't look myself in the mirror if I left.  All I want, is for people to STAND UP.  It is YOUR RESPONSIBILITY.  It's your responsibility to help.  Don't be that douchebag that helps some guy hook up with a drunk girl.

Don't be that that person.  Please realize that it's your responsibility to watch out for someone, to make sure that no harm falls on them.

No one deserves to be violated.  No one deserves to be raped.  No one is asking for it.  No one.

Please do the right thing, be alert when you're out, and when you see something please, please don't be silent.  Call the police or if you won't be endangered speak out but whatever you do, do SOMETHING.


Some Aishwarya Love

I can go on and on about Aishwarya so here is some Aishwarya love for you.  Why we love Aishwarya Rai (Bachchan)..
She's Mohini.  She's the queen of lightning. #damnthatgifisamazing

Her beauty is out of this world.. OUT. OF. THIS. WORLD!! Check this GIF out!!!













Her eyes can cut you down in one glance..

ONE FREAKING GLANCE...






Her shyness and "ada" (grace, mannerisms) are so indian and beautiful!..












She dances and moves like the wind, she's free spirited, beautiful to watch when she moves and a work of art when she dances..




Gorgeousness and probably one of the biggest factors to my Aish obsession.


She's sexy and she know's it (although she rarely plays this card!)







Hotness personified
Dayum.




Her expressions are to kill for!!!




If this face was truly revealed right in front of you, you would die happy because seriously, look at that reveal..





You wish you were on the other end of this phone call




You wish you were the mirror..


 You like the retarded expressions


Her chemistry with SRK



 Her smile...


 How every movement seems like a photoshoot or work of art...










Powered by Blogger.

About Me

Blues

Contact Form

Name

Email *

Message *

Search This Blog

Popular Posts

recent posts

Tweet Me!

Popular Posts