C'est La Vie

I've been working since I was 10 years old.

I did a paper route as a child for 5 years, until I was 15 turning 16 years old.  Most people did a paper route for a few months, I really don't understand (looking back) but am amazed that I did it for 5 years.

First, I would get the delivery of papers (twice a week!) to my house, flyers separate.  Then I would sit on the bottom flight of my stairs with the flyers one stair above, open the newspaper and insert each flyer into approximately 200+ newspapers.  I would then load half of the papers into my trolley and make my rounds.  Through sun, rain and snow I would roll my trolley and walk up to each door step to place the paper into the letterbox, then I would go back home and collect round two.  Often I had a friend from school who lived on my paper route come out and walk with me if the weather was nice, and I'll admit, a few times I had my parents put all the papers in the van and have my mom help me.  It paid for my new shoes for "back to school", it paid for my Lip Smackers (root beer was my fav flavor), it paid for my 5 cent candies, it paid for my $1 chocolate cake that I would buy at lunch time (McCains, so delicious) and it literally paid approximately $27-30 dollars every two weeks.  If I went on vacation, I had to train and hire my replacement (a classmate who I then paid).  It taught me responsibility, it taught me the value of a dollar and it taught me that no matter what, rain or shine you had to go out there and do what you signed up to do.

My second job, I was hired on the spot at one of the most terrifying perfume stores in the mall.  I was turning 16 in one week, I was given written cheques every two weeks by very stereotypical looking hairy chested, gold chained wearing men, and I was told to NEVER, EVER sell the customer what they want.  We sold the customer what we could afford to sell (cheap fragrances that the store would profit off of versus legitimate perfumes that the store would not make much money on).  The turnover rate was high, approximately every 3 weeks we would have a new girl for the one that quit, I lasted almost 1 year.  I was self conscious, scared and intimidated.  I had to stand at the doorway of the store and call out "up to 70% off all fragrances" to complete strangers and then when they walked in I had to sell them what I wanted "If you like Dolce and Gabbana you'll loove this new fragrance that's so popular right now called Water Drops".  I became their #1 girl, so the first customer to walk in I would approach.  If there was only every one customer in the store at a time, that meant that I would always be doing the work (because I was the best at selling).  It taught me.  It taught me how to bullshit, how to sell (um not directly related to bullshitting lol), how to get over your fears and EVERY single other job that I've ever worked since that job has been a piece of cake!!!!  That experience can't be bought.

Every job after that, was a mixture of fun, hard work, and running around getting stuff done.  I never went more than 3 weeks without a job, I couldn't do that, I NEEDED a job.  I worked at drugstores, restaurants, clothing stores, a photo lab, an electronics shop.  I would get off school at 3pm and work 4pm-midnight or 7 to midnight shifts, and I would still get my homework done.  I never asked my parents to pay for field trips, lunch money, back to school clothes or anything that I wanted.  I earned it, I bought it.

Studying was a luxury, there was never a time in my life when I felt that I had all the time in the world to study, not even in University.

I messed up, I'm not going to pretend that every job I did I was flawless at, there were times when I was in high school that I couldn't get up, or I just had to call in sick but looking back at the availability I had to give my part time jobs as a high school student  (every weekday from 4-midnight and every weekend) I guess that was pretty understandable that I would often be too exhausted and drained (or would be scheduled to work the night before an exam - sorry Shoppers Drug Mart!).

There was one time that I worked two jobs, I worked from 7am-3pm full time Monday to Friday and then I would take two buses and the train to my second job and work from 5pm-9pm.  It was heaven and it was hell at the same time.  I would be so exhausted that if I had the car (on occasion) I would drive home and just sit in the car, not wanting to get out.  It was heaven in the sense that I needed that at that time in my life.  I needed to be so bone tired that I would go home and just fall asleep.  I needed to not have free time on my hands.  I would consider it a "day off" if I didn't have to work the evening shift at my second job!  It was awesome!

Too often people complain about their jobs and I just DON'T get it.  Do you know what that job gives you?  It doesn't just give you money, it gives you freedom.  Maybe it's not the job that you want to do for the rest of your life, but it is the PATH and the way to get to what you want to do for the rest of your life.  It gives you the freedom to make choices, it gives you a sense of direction, it gives you a purpose and I have never in my life worked at a job that I did not personally grow and benefit from that.  I am not at all discounting education but it's funny that all my years at school have blended together, while I look back on my life and can distinctly recall what I learnt and what I did at each job.  Too many people these days have parents that will comfortably pay for everything their child does but I just don't get why that child doesn't have the sense of ego and pride in themselves to want to go out there and make their own coin.


I'd rather hustle than have things given to me.  I'd rather do without than ask for something.  I respect people who can not only talk grand schemes but who can put them to action and get something done.  I love people who put their money where their mouth is.  My money has not only helped me personally, but it's helped my family.  I was able to give someone very important to me time with someone very important to them (and me) and wouldn't go back and change anything in my life just because of this one thing that I did.  I will always, always thank god that I was able to help someone in that way.



I'm passionate about work and working, I will work for as long as I can work and I can honestly say that these values were instilled in me because of my father and because of my eldest sister.  I hope as an elder sister myself to be able to motivate other youngsters to realize the value of an honest living because it's far too easy in the society and culture that I live in now for young individuals to be un motivated and/or buy into the fast money lifestyle.

Yes, I feel like blogging about the elevator incident.

Yes I'm a week late, whatever.  I'm not really here to talk about what happened in the elevator (it was mind blowingly epic) but more about what happened after the fact.  As you all know, the internet broke.  People went CRAZY on social media with meme's, jokes, and statuses demanding to know what exactly happened in that elevator.  AND I LOVED IT.

The hashtag #WhatJayZSaidToSolange was one of the few that were trending on Twitter shortly after (which is a bit sexist, maybe Jay Z said nothing and Solange is just one crazy ass b*tch).  Hilariously, what seemed to make the most news was Beyonce's reaction, or rather her complete NON reaction.  She just stood there.


The memes, jokes, people's comments on them cracked me up for hours.  I'm pretty sure I watched the elevator footage about fifteen times, obsessively noticed Beyonce's hand movements, tried to lip read as much as I could and essentially had the time of my life.  Then, the haters came out on social media.

"To all the people who are posting and talking about Jay Z and Solange, there are children dying in the world, and girls like getting like kidnapped".  wah wah wah.. No shit Sherlock.  The next time you post a freaking picture of your nails, or a selfie, or a stupid status update about your dinner, your gifts from your man - guess who's going to post pictures of people dying in the world on your page?  ME.  Why, because you are a pretentious, self absorbed, self righteous, annoying hater.

That's why.  If people cannot, on social media, talk about culturally relevant information then where the hell else are they supposed to do it?  If you have such a problem with your friends being into Beyonce and Jay Z then why don't you get off Facebook and go read some news or watch CNN if you're someone who is so obsessed with world news?

Hi friends and creepers,

This post is not really about my mom but it is.  I always think that I'm a bad person, that I get more than I deserve, that I'm not worthy really but today (Mother's day) I guess it hit me that I must have done SOMETHING, to have the people that I have in my life (whether I did it in a past life or now).

People care about me.  Isn't that weird?  I have the best mom in the world, the best family in the world, the best friends in the world and the best life in the world.  So I must have done SOMETHING right!  I'm just so happy for this, for all of the crazy, fun and amazing people that I've met, for all the experiences I've had, for everything.  *insert the Because I'm Happy song here*

Somehow, I actually found amazing people, somehow I actually have the best family and by family I mean my immediate family and the psycho goofballs I met along the way who are everything to me.  I don't know how I got this lucky but I'll just shut up and take it before they start to question things as well!

It's really beautiful when you see how much care and love someone has for you - so don't take it for granted #notetoself .. Life is pretty freaking awesome.  I think I've had a good one and I'm excited for the rest of my life to unfold :D

#rideordie #lovemypeeps 

There will be one time in your life that will be a defining moment, a turning point.

Q: "Does it not bother you at all that there are people around the world that are looking at you in a sleazy way, or do you like the popularity?" "Don't you care that there are all these 'dippers' commenting on your pictures, or do you like that stuff?"  "Why don't you put your stuff on private?".

A: "Yeah I do it so people will jack off to me at night."


Ok, in all honesty, why do I do this?  I thought that, I would be "somebody", maybe a girl who was interning somewhere, maybe a girl that was auditioning somewhere, maybe a girl who was working and doing stuff on the side.  I've always been someone who loved meeting people, who loved being expressive (reading, journalism, writing, dancing, performing has always been part of me), I look at writing or Twitter or Instagram as a creative expression, as a diary of sorts, and not to mention a great networking opportunity.  Also, I work in social media, I completely disagree with having PRIVATE accounts for the most part (Facebook and Instagram I can see how you may just want family/friends to view it) but WHY DO PEOPLE HAVE PRIVATE TWITTER ACCOUNTS?  It just baffles me.  So no, I will never private my stuff, I think it's dumb to do that.

Right now, I'm nobody, but I can't fully pull the plug on the public me.  I still have that darned sliver of hope that maybe one day I'll... figure it all out in a manner that won't leave me wanting more.  Not sure if this is humanly possible but it's a hope!

There are people who pursue a public career choice in a private manner, there are people who pursue private careers in a public manner, and then there are people who pursue public careers in a public manner.  I personally do not regret having put myself out there in the past, (or now, if I am) because I've met so many amazing people and have come across some pretty cool situations!

Now please note, I'm not saying that I am a public personality, I'm simply talking about how as an individual you can be a little more public or a little more private.  Everyone is fairly public these days, I can probably find most of you on LinkedIn or Facebook or Twitter, and most people post pictures that are up for public consumption.  Do I think that 1 sleazy guy is probably viewing a girl's picture right now?  Of course he is.  At the end of the day a girl is going to be looked at no matter what by someone in a sleazy manner no matter what.  Does that mean that we're supposed to lock ourselves in a cage and only go out when fully covered?

Do I like the popularity?  Firstly, what popularity?  This is so relative.  I would say that the most "out there" or "popular" I have ever FELT in my life was when I was in bhangra.  This was pre - Much Music tryouts which is what I would consider the start of a more "public" me.  So yes, bhangra was when I felt the most popular.  If I was just into "feeling popular" than I would have just stayed in bhangra, gone out with multiple people, talked to 50 other guys and had a grand old time.  That's not what I did because I don't care about that.  I did not have 2000 Twitter or Instagram followers or 1000 Facebook friends at the time, but I felt like wow people know me, people like me (in a normal way), etc.  So no, I'm not doing this for popularity, but I do appreciate the fact that in this day and age, having some klout online is a good thing.  Ask any producer if he would rather pick someone with 15K followers or 100 followers (of course if you're truly beautiful, it likely will not matter how many followers you have, but for those that are not god gifted, everything else helps :) ).  To gain social influence, you sometimes have to appeal to the masses and do your business needs to keep that up.  It's purely business.  Trust me when I say this, a nice selfie can go a long way haha.

As a woman who cares deeply about objectification, it's always been difficult to want to be in an industry that puts so much emphasis on physical appearance.  The joy of acting or wanting to be in a medium that has given me so much joy has always outweighed my feminist views (so far).  I would love to be able to change things from within, but also I think there's something beautiful in not caring about how people perceive you and owning your sexuality.

I've tried my best to not be sleazy myself, to not be just tits and ass.  I appeared in a music video once that sang about how every guy wants a nice car and a nice girl.  I also appear on top of the car in one scene (wearing a pink and white striped A-line dress mind you not a short and tight number).  I was also pretty young but... I remember thinking that the song was kind of cool.  What was wrong with a guy saying that he wants a nice car and a nice girl, is that not a humble ambition?  Is it not like me saying, I want a nice husband and a nice house?  Do we have to deny EVERYTHING and become completely asexual and unrealistic in order to be an advocate for self respect and woman's issues?

Also, honestly sometimes, you just want to do something because it's fun!  I did a music video where the artist literally says that he pops a boner.. seriously.  This one, might be a little hard to explain, so I might not even go there in this blog post because then I'll have to touch on what I feel about being sexual, open and honest but I still thought it was a classy shoot lol.   I HAVE boobs, I HAVE an ass this is part of me being a woman and I don't feel that I should have to hide this fact from people just so that I don't get judged by men and other woman as being "skanky" or "slutty".  I also did a swimsuit shoot for a men's magazine that shall not be named (only because they changed the answers to my interview to better suit them).  I thought it was classy, my dad did not have a problem with it, my brother was there with me when I shot the whole thing and I had a great time.  It's a swimsuit, and I was posing.  I'm not rolling around in the sand pouring water over myself while licking my lips.  It's a beach shoot, I'm wearing a bikini, and I quite liked the results.  Did I do this to have men look at me in a sexual way?  I would have to say that's not the THE reason why I did it but yes, I wanted to look appealing I definitely didn't want men to be repulsed when looking at the images, but there was a greater purpose other than "wanting to look hot and be popular".. like seriously.. no girl needs to be in a freaking swimsuit in a magazine or in a music video or doing photo shoots to be popular with men.

Maybe I've done some out there things, maybe I've made some choices that people will not understand, maybe I've lost all my chances at being selected as eligible marriage material by an Indian matchmaker but this is me.  Take it or leave it!  I don't do things without a lot of thought (which I think is contrary to what people may think), and I can feel good about every decision I've ever made in my life so at the end of the day isn't that what life should be about?

I hope you got your answer.

My response: Fellas, girls are sick of hearing you talk about the Friend Zone.  The "friendzone" is a scenario the rejected make up to make themselves seem like victims simply for not having their feelings returned.  Get over it.



Now I've touched on this topic before in my "Nice guys" finish last post but that was quite some time ago (3 years?), and I don't think I fully delved into this topic the way I should have.  Most people who read my blog post at that point didn't really get that "nice" with quotation marks in my vocabulary - did not equal a truly genuine and good guy.

Every guy and every girl should be NICE to other people.  That would be basic manners would it not to be pleasant, kind and friendly!?  So why is it that when a guy feels like he's a "Nice" guy and he's not getting the girls that he wants he suddenly blames everything on being friend zoned and girls not appreciating the value of his niceness?  Why do other guys back this absurd theory up?  

Why is it that GIRLS have to hear "He's Just Not That Into You" where we're taught in books, in movies, in popular culture that we're supposed to stop acting like fools and ACCEPT the fact that the man is just simply not into us...

...While Guys are allowed to BLAME women for not "recognizing" the fact that they were so great and kind and wait for it.. nice?  Guys are allowed to just walk around being like "man I treated her so well, I listened to her while she talked about all of her problems and watched all her favourite movies with her and she just friend zoned me, what a b*tch, chicks are f*cked" while girls are told to accept it.  I'm sorry you're right it's MY fault that someone was friendly, showed common courtesy, had good conversations with me about topics and it's my fault that I didn't want to immediately jump his bones or marry him because of this.  


Why are girls supposed to be so thankful that a guy is being nice to her that we're supposed to date/marry/whatever them?  Do we not deserve, does the GUY not deserve to meet someone who has a genuine connection with them?  Whatever happened to LOVE, Chemistry, Compatibility, Attraction, Passion and other such powerful emotions?  I want men to want more for themselves, I want them to find a girl that loves them for who they truly are (flaws and all) and to wait for someone who they genuinely, truly connect with and most of all I want them to stop blaming women for when their feelings are not reciprocated.  It is not a woman's duty to like you just because you were nice and friendly.

I know so many NICE girls, that have bad qualities about them like every other human being, as well as many NICE guys with bad qualities about them.  Just because NICE GIRL+NICE GUY meet and the person fits all the criteria (well educated, nice, smart, kind, good family, can cook, good job) does NOT mean that they should be together!  

Life is a journey as they say, and I don't know about you but I want someone that I can see myself enjoying my time with for the rest of my life, walking, running, exploring and growing with.. not just settling for someone who checks off the "marriageable" or "dateable" qualities in a man.